Terrible Moments in Taglining: Alien vs Predator

I know this movie is a decade old, but I've got to say, I don't think that tagline's accurate. Let's consider the consequences of either possible victory, shall we?

Option 1 - Predators Win

If the Predators defeat the Aliens, then their 'rite of passage' will be complete, and they will leave, returning in another hundred years or so - next time probably without killing any humans during the ceremony, since there's no reason to believe that humans would coincidentally be in Antarctica again that time.

Also, depending on global warming, Predators will probably swing by every couple of years and kill a few people in a jungle/desert, but they were going to do that no matter what happened in Antarctica.

Option 2 - Aliens Win

Upon killing the Predators, the Aliens would then freeze/starve to death in the Antarctic.

Either way, I can't really see how either one of those results can be described as 'We Lose', assuming the 'we' there refers to humanity.

Terrible Moments in Taglining: Real Steel

"Courage is stronger than steel"

I'm fairly sure that's not accurate. If it was, then Hugh Jackman would have climbed into the ring and fought the evil robot himself, like the main character in the Twilight Zone episode this was based on.

Of course, the character in the story lost, and that doesn't play on the big screen.

Terrible Moments in Taglining: Pandorum

“Fear what happens next.”


Next? I can't even tell what's happening now. And I've seen the movie.

Terrible Moments in Taglining: The Mist

“Fear changes everything”


I'm going to go out on a limb and suggest that it's the dimensional rift that changes everything.

Terrible Moments in Taglining: Orca

“The Killer whale, is one of the most intelligent creatures in the universe.”


Universe? You're going with universe? Setting aside the comma, explain to me how you could  make that kind of a claim. And then go on for another paragraph!


“across seas, across time, across all obstacles”


Oddly, I completely would have watched a movie about a superintelligent Orca traveling through time to battle aliens.

Terrible Moments in Taglining: An American Werewolf in London: The Monster Movie

“From the director of Animal House... A different kind of animal.”


I can't even make a joke here. This is just depressing. You might has wall have taglined it: “We have no idea how to market a movie.”

Terrible Moments in Taglining: Sucker Punch

“You will be unprepared”


Am I not unprepared now? Will the film somehow strip me of my current level of preparedness, leaving me unprepared at some indistinct date in the future?